New Zealand Railways, Publicity Branch, 1935.
There are 10 pitfalls to avoid if you want to be a consistently loving and effective parent.
There is no way anybody reading this is doing all ten of these things wrong. I list them here only so that we can, each of us, do an examination of conscience — a searching and fearless moral inventory or ourselves, if you will.
I borrowed (and modified) this list from Jeffrey Gitomer’s Little Book of Leadership (2011). He calls them “The 9.5 Tragic Flaws of Leadership.” If you are prepared to be honest with yourself, consider this list:
Dec 11
5
“A Better Way to Change”?
Is there a better way to change our behavior and performance?
Photo by Jacobim Mugatu
My last post introduced W. Timothy Gallwey’s “better way to change” — the principles behind his highly successful “Inner Game” approach to improving sports performance and business results. Here are some more ideas you can use to help your kids learn and grow — and to nurture yourself as a learner, too.
The Basic Ideas
At the heart of Gallwey’s approach is his discovery of two selves within the learner: Self 1 and Self 2. Self 2 is . . .
Dec 11
2
“A Better Way to Change”
Photo by familymwr
What if you could be your kids’ best coach, mentor, or teacher?
You can do that — using an approach they might not have seen since they learned to walk and talk!
Gallwey and The Inner Game
W. Timothy Gallwey, in his bestselling books, The Inner Game of Tennis (1974), The Inner Game of Golf (1979), The Inner Game of Work (2000), and others, shows us how — with what he convincingly calls “a better way to change.”
He is famous in sports psychology and as a business expert because of his ability to coach individuals to greater levels of performance. He has done this by . . .
Nov 11
23
Knowing Isn’t the Same as Doing
Photo by isfamedia
Simply knowing best practices doesn’t get the job done. It’s following them — doing it! — that will get the results we’re aiming for. Taking action is a powerful best practice.
Monitoring Best Practices
Airline pilots have pre-flight, in-flight, and pre-landing checklists. And many hospitals are now reducing costly human error by using checklists in the operating room. That’s how best practices involving life-and-death situations are made routine — by
Nov 11
21
5 Things to Avoid When Listening
Photo by vigawi
We all know this, but I’m going to say it anyway: One of the greatest gifts we can give to our kids is the gift of generously and genuinely listening to them.
Scott Ginsberg, the modern marketeer, has some powerful words of advice about effective listening. Here are some of them with my comments in square brackets [like these]:
Don’t tell someone not to feel a certain way.
This cheats her out of having her feelings.
[This cheats him out of having his feelings too. Feelings are neither right nor wrong and dealing with them is the right and responsibility of the person who has them. The best thing we can do for our kids is
Every fall, worried parents get another dose of guilt around the promotion of “Family Day: a day to eat dinner with your children™.” Over the last ten years, there have been recurring flurries of media coverage promoting the idea that having frequent family meals — usually supper, eaten together as a family — provides a host of positive results for kids, specifically teenage kids.
Our Kids Want Us!
This idea is strongly promoted by the National Council on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University (CASA Columbia). Their report on the factors that correlate with increased substance abuse among high school students is updated regularly. Family Day is part of CASA Columbia’s “national initiative to remind parents that what your kids really want at dinner is…
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Meet John
John Hunckler is a leadership mentor for coaches and parents looking to raise young leaders. John is a Notre Dame grad and a proud father of three.
